Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
A+ Viking dick
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize