Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
