he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
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