I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize
