White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
