if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Randomize
