i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
