a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Randomize
