look no pants
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Randomize
