if i died would you start the facebook group?
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
