You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
My feet surprised me
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
