That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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