is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I pour the whiskey from now on
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize