at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize