i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
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