i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize