oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i would punch a child for taco bell
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Randomize
