So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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