i would punch a child for taco bell
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
