I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I will be naked everywhere
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
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