Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
The power of my boobs compel you
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
