Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Randomize
