Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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