So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Randomize
