what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
two words...techno handjob
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
