I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
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