Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
