Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
