I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
