Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
