We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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