summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
