I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize