Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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