is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
