I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
