Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
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