Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
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