when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
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