Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize
