My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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