When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
