____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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