I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
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