I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize