I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
