You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
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