Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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