Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Randomize
