I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
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