oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
